The Tooth Fairy: Round 2

When you don't talk to your kids about the important issues, such as the Tooth Fairy, then someone else will.  Someone really convoluted according to the conversation I had with my daughter.

TinaToothLoser: I have to wiggle my tooth, so it comes out.
Awesomeness: What happens when your tooth comes out?
TinaToothLoser: Well, first you wiggle, wiggle, wiggle.  And then your tooth comes out.  Then you put  the tooth under your pillow.  And then the Tooth Fairy comes.  She leaves you a prize.

Aha!  "A prize."  Some generic trinket.  If I'm not expected to give her cash, then hell, I'll just pick up a bunch of cheap crappy toys and be done with it.  I'm super lucky.....

.....I wonder what she means by "prize."  I'm lucky, but I'm also super lazy, so if she can just tell me what she wants, then I'll be set.

Awesomeness: What does the Tooth Fairy bring you for a prize?
TinaToothLoser: Um.  Well.  A pack of sheep.

Fuck.

What Did I Miss Today?

Whenever I get home from work, I like to find out right away what kind of day my kids had.  Did they eat?  Did they nap?  Was there anything unusual that went on that day that I need to be aware of?

There are days, like today, when I wished I never asked.

Mr. Awesomeness: Oh, by the way, apparently our daughter has been either sticking something between her teeth or picking at her gums with her fingernails.  She's causing her gums to bleed because she wants the tooth fairy to come and leave her a present.

Awesomeness: ....what the.....?

Mr. Awesomeness: I already told her THERE IS NO TOOTH FAIRY.

ToothFairyCarrie: Aaaaaawwww!

Wow, I just got home.  Home to an emo four-year-old who's getting yelled at for believing in the tooth fairy.  Parenting books don't prepare you for this moment.  Maybe one of these days, I'll write a parenting book that does.

Anyway, so I'm trying to smooth this over with reason.

Awesomeness: Honey, I'm sorry you're disappointed about the tooth fairy.  You need your teeth, though.  Your teeth help you eat.  It's very hard to eat when your teeth are gone.

ToothFairyCarrie: Aaaaawwww!  But Mama...."

Is this really an, "Aaaaawww!  But Mama...." subject?

Can I go back to work now please?