Dada: The Hero

Dada!  I wanna go ni-ni now!

Her Dada's response:

Sweetie, you can go ni-ni in about 10 minutes.  Dada has to kill all of these monsters here to help save the Earth.

Psssst...dude, you're playing WoW.  I'm sure it doesn't even take place on the Earth.

Overheard Around The House

MumbleMouthMartha: *mumblemumblemumble*

Mr. Awesomeness: Speak up baby, I cant hear you.

Mumbler: Want some apple juice.

Mr. A: I can get you some apple juice in just a minute.

Mumbler: *whiiiiiiiine!*

Mr. A: Do you see this guy?  I'm going to kill this guy, then I'll get you some juice.  Okay?

Mumbler: Okay...





For the record, Mr. A plays W.O.W. and was talking about killing a cartoon character.  I'm not sure I should have to disclaim that, but you never know when a body's going to show up unexpectedly.

Gee, Thanks!

• I'm thankful for a minute to myself the day after Thanksgiving.  Yesterday, my house was infested with 4 children under the age of 5.  It reminded me of my burning desire to double up on birth control.
• I'm thankful for no-nap babies who go to bed an hour early and sleep for 12 hours straight.
• I'm thankful for Woolite rug cleaner with Oxyclean.  This stuff got Jell-o out of my dining room rug.  I am a die hard fan now.
• I'm thankful for good friends who don't take it personally when you grab them, throw them in a headlock and pimp slap them. (We stayed up playing Lunch Money.)
• I'm thankful that the kids managed to not be sick for the holiday. 

For the record, I am most certainly not paid in any fashion to endorse anything.  When I do it, it's because the shit actually works like it's supposed to.  I'll let you know if this changes.

Athlete's Crotch?

Why we bother to buy our kids toys is beyond me.  When they play, they always choose something that was never intended for entertainment.  A flashlight, a water bottle, a toilet paper tube.  Not items you find on a shelf in the toy department anywhere.

PlayfulPam made up a new game today.  She took her Dada's sock, a dryer sheet and a wind-up Eeyore toy and stuff it all in her underwear, then ran around the house.  My little girl is stuffing her panties.  

Her Dada and I both hope that sock was clean.

The Next Gold Medalist In The Couch Diving Olympics

BungeeBoy, I don't get the fascination. Couch Diving, as a sport, doesn't even have any clearly defined rules. You seem to start out the same way each time: climb onto the couch. From there, it gets a little sketchy.

The first event, The Side Dive, is where you crawl over to the arms of the couch and try to dive off head first. I'm not sure what the excitement of that could possibly be, but you giggle like a hopped up lunatic whenever you're doing it -- which is the only thing that's saved you from actually falling over that way.

I do enjoy this more than the next event: Back Of The Couch Dive. Also known as the Sprained Neck Splat. This event is usually saved for the guys who like to light their ball hairs on fire Little Guy. You're going to need to wait a few years to try it.

You also like to practice your Sofa Spring Dive. This is where you stand up on the cushions, then sit down really hard. This causes this fun bouncing movement. I'm sure this is a blast right before your momentum bounces you right off the edge. "Table To The Head" dismount is not much fun, is it?

Then there are the times that you're feeling old school and just plain old roll right off the couch. B0000RING! Try a triple-tuck next time.

I Got You!

Fun game to play when both parties are participating LittleLadyLookAtMe. When I'm spoonfeeding your brother pureed squash it can go from annoying to dangerous quickly.

Jumping on my back like a crazy monkey and grabbing my head is only fun for you. "I got you!" Yeah, you did. Again. Good job. No honey, Mommy doesn't want to play. She just wants to dislodge your brother's spoon from his large intestine.

Oh, you're going to hit him in the face with a rattle instead? Well, I guess that's a different game.

I'm glad you're feeling better.