Friday, December 18, 2009

Guest Blogger

I had a huge post all typed out about how my son is now a hyperactive zombie and I am now a catatonic zombie.

I had to leave for a moment to get AnnieAccomplice some crackers and came back to "Your post has been published successfully!"  Um.  Okay.

I look.  Apparently GaryGuestBlogger does not want me telling anyone about his nighttime shenanigans.  So please excuse the last post.  I would delete it, but the SuperProudMommy gene is kicking in.  I just can't trash my kid's first published story.

Hope there's many more to come.  Just not on my blog.

Up All Night! Sleep All Day!


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Sunday, December 13, 2009

I <3 Daddy!

PollyPJ loves her pajamas.  Most of all, she loves her "I <3 Daddy" pajamas.  When she got up yesterday morning she needed to tell me all about them.

PollyPJ: Look Mama!  My PJs.  Says "I love Daddy."
AwesomeMom: Yes, baby.  They do say, "I love Daddy." Good job!
PPJ: Daddy PJs are my favorite.
AM: I'm glad those are your favorite.
PPJ: Look Mama! *takes off PJ top and turns it inside out* Now it says "I love Mama!"

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Goodbye And Good Riddance!

Today I finally unloaded all of my old baby gear.  I was at a point where I was going to post it all up on Craigslist and offer $50.00 for someone to show up and haul it all away.

Why didn't I give it to Goodwill or leave it on the street corner if I wanted to get rid of it that bad?  Well, because I'm a sap and wanted to give it to someone we knew who could use it.

It all served me well; some of it made it through 2 babies.  I hope they enjoy it as much as (or in the case of the bouncer, more than) my babies did.

Goodbye bouncer seat that made both kids scream like it was made of fire.

Goodbye car seat.  I have nothing bad to say in parting to you, because you totally rock.  It was really nice to just leave the kids in their seat to pack them inside when they fell asleep in the car.


Goodbye walker.  We barely used you.  I think the boy sat in you once.  You were cute and all, but my kids learned to walk just fine without you.  You were more of a 'temporary confiner' than a 'walker'.

Goodbye bouncer-saurus-rex.  You win the award for the hugest, most obnoxious bouncer on the planet.  Grandma got you for the boy because she heard us mention the word bouncer in a sentence once around Christmas time, or some other bullshit reason.  You were enjoyed for about 5 minutes, then you haunted 1/2 my loft for the last year.

Doesn't he look indignant?

Goodbye 3rd baby monitor that we received as a baby shower gift.  We really only needed 2.  You were never even removed from the package.  I hope you come in handy for someone else.

Another baby monitor?  Oh awesome!  We can use it...if the baby's ever alone in the garage...

And, last but not least, the wipe warmer that I'm sure would have ruled if we had somewhere to safely use it. 

Thank you to the couple taking this stuff off my hands.  Mr. A was about to toss a rattlesnake at me if I bellyached about how all this crap was overrunning our house again.  You just saved my life.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Why Doesn't He Like Me?

Mr. A is not the best of buddies with our little buddy.  The kid, frankly, cries when he's left alone with him.  I keep telling him that the baby does not respond well to the following:

  • When he's crying, "Oh, just fucking stop," doesn't work.  Trust me, I tried it already.
  • Putting your face in his face and yelling, "Hi!" like a maniac is scary.
  • Constantly 'playing' with him by pulling him away from things he's trying to reach is only funny for you. (And maybe me.)
  • Your references to him as "Floor Pisser" and "Jerk Boy" are not terms of endearment.
  • Sometimes when he's crying he's hungry, or thirsty, or his teeth hurt, or his diaper is full.  It's not because "he's being an asshole again".  I mean, I might be wrong sometimes, but I think I'm mostly on target with that.
This would explain the boy's reaction to Dada.  Now to work on why the cats don't like him...