Sunday, January 31, 2010

Missing Ingredients

No matter what we're feeding FrankieFoodFiend, there's always 2 missing ingredients.  He adds them in a ritualistic fashion whenever he eats:

  1. The first ingredient is hair.  Everything must be worn as a hat and smashed down flat before going on to the second ingredient...
  2. Floor sprinkles.  When he's done mashing hair into his food, he drops it to the floor.  
He'll repeat this ritual until all of his food is laying on the floor, then he'll finally pick it up and eat it.

I spend a lot of money on baby shampoo and Swiffer cleaning pads.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Me Too! Me Too!

LittleLuluMeToo:  I like lollipops!
Awesomeness: You like lollipops?
LittleLuluMeToo: Me too!

*when we were playing Mario Wii*
Awesomeness: Oh, good job, you got 20 coins!
LittleLuluMeToo: Yeah, me too!

Awesomeness: Did you have fun with your friends today?
LittleLuluMeToo: Me too!  Me too, Mama!

Monday, January 25, 2010

Meet Filthy McNasty

Who is this pile of dirt with me?
That's my kid, Filthy McNasty!

She's cute underneath all the grime
It comes off for a limited time
Then back to school she goes
And from her head to her toes
She piles on crud by the pound
Leaves no speck of dust on the ground

 A walking pit of slime and pee
That's my kid, Filthy McNasty!

Sunday, January 24, 2010

I Tawt I Taw A Birthday Tat!

So, the speech thing again with MissyMushMouth...She's coming along, but still has some struggles.  What she'll do sometimes is substitute words she's fairly unfamiliar with for words that sound similar.  Then, often, she will also choose to substitute those words for ... well, just words she likes better.

We're watching Looney Tunes (because I'm the best mom ever... *cough*) and it's one of the Sylvester / Tweety cartoons.  Tweety does his usual speech and MMM is fascinated.

MMM: Oooooh!  Mama, mama!  Look, he saw a birthday cat!!

Awesomeness: ... a what cat?

MMM:  Look!  It's the birthday cat!

Awesomeness:  No, sweetie he's a pus....yep, that's right, he's a birthday cat.  Good job, big girl.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Overheard Around The House

MumbleMouthMartha: *mumblemumblemumble*
Mr. Awesomeness: Speak up baby, I cant hear you.
Mumbler: Want some apple juice.
Mr. A: I can get you some apple juice in just a minute.
Mumbler: *whiiiiiiiine!*
Mr. A: Do you see this guy?  I'm going to kill this guy, then I'll get you some juice.  Okay?
Mumbler: Okay...

For the record, Mr. A plays W.O.W. and was talking about killing a cartoon character.  I'm not sure I should have to disclaim that, but you never know when a body's going to show up unexpectedly.

That Explains It

The last week or so has been particularly cruel.  SharkToothSeamus has been a screaming non-stop like he's being eviscerated.  The screams could freeze your soul.  He's not eating well, he's hardly sleeping at all.  It's been a nightmare.

Last night, I tried to keep him calm by playing with him.  I turned him upside down and he's actually laughing -- for once.  That's when I notice 8 new teeth.  8.  All at once.

This kid needs a trophy.  And some Motrin.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Go To Sleep....Go To Sleeeeep....GO TO SLEEP LITTLE BABY!

So Sabertooth has officially earned a new nickname: Count Crybaby.  The Count because this kid just prefers to stay up all night.  I've been fighting his nocturnal habits for too many months now and figure that the new moniker will shame him into falling into sync with normal circadian rhythms.

The Crybaby comes from the fact that he actually is one.  He doesn't really want to nap much during the day anymore and then he wants to hang out all night too.  Some days he's awake from 6:00 in the morning until 11:00 at night with little more than a 15-30 minute nap.  This means that he's whiny and clingy for HOURS.

Hell, I get crabby when I have to conform to that schedule.

Oh, wait.  Since he gets up at 6:00, that means he gets 1 more hour of sleep than me.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Goodbye 2009

Good riddance.

The last week of the year was 2009's way of throwing one last flying elbow into our chests.

NuclearHeadNelly got up to 105.8 degrees on Tuesday.  We took her in to urgent care to see if they knew what was wrong and could help her in any way.  Of course, when we get her there, her temp had dropped to 97.  There's nothing for them to do for a kid that isn't presenting any symptoms, so we just took her home.

The next day, she was back up past 105 again.  We took her to see her regular doctor who promptly sent us on our way to the children's hospital for some blood work.  Whew! Action!! Action is my favorite.

Because our kid is stubborn -- her name even means "spirit of battle" and she earned it in the womb -- she somehow willed her veins not to dispense blood.  It took 4 arm pokes for them to even find a vein, then 3 nurses had to hold her in position while they forced the vein to give up the goods.  Even then, it took over an hour for them to get 2 small vials of blood from her.

She hated being there with a passion.  She cried to go home.  Even when her temperature dropped to 95 degrees, then leaped back up to 104.5, she was begging to go.  This, of course, lead to a hunger strike, which added to the misery of the hospital experience, because now she's also starving.

Two days of being in the hospital, 2 coloring books and a yellow balloon later, she's fine and back home.  I'm just sore that 2009 decided to kick us in the nuts this one last time before giving it up.

Here's hoping that 2010 is a year of good health.