Missing Ingredients

No matter what we're feeding FrankieFoodFiend, there's always 2 missing ingredients.  He adds them in a ritualistic fashion whenever he eats:

1. The first ingredient is hair.  Everything must be worn as a hat and smashed down flat before going on to the second ingredient...
2. Floor sprinkles.  When he's done mashing hair into his food, he drops it to the floor.  

He'll repeat this ritual until all of his food is laying on the floor, then he'll finally pick it up and eat it.

I spend a lot of money on baby shampoo and Swiffer cleaning pads.